As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two.
- Norman Wisdom
One of the most difficult things in the world is to convince a woman that even a bargain costs money.
Edgar Watson Howe
A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success!
A harmful truth is always better then..a useful lie!
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
Laughter is the closest distance between two people.
Start every day with a smile and get it over with.
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day.
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.
Don't take life too seriously, you'll never get out of it alive.
Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.